Fun With Spam

Sometimes, I just like to play with spammers. It doesn't matter where they come from either. If it is from just basic email or from Craigslist spammers, I like to freak their minds a bit. Here is my latest bundle of joy. This comes from a person identified as Captain Scott J Wright.

Dear Friend,

I hope my e-mail meets you well. I am in need of your assistance. My names are Capt. Scott J. Wright of the Engineering Unit of US Military here in Ba'qubah in Iraq; we have about $10 Million US dollars that we want to move out of the country. My partners and I need a good partner out there, someone we can trust to receive the funds on our behalf. It is oil money and legal.

We have made arrangements with a Diplomatic Courier Service that will move the funds out of Iraq as a Family Treasures, also we have made arrangement to transfer the said fund through Bank of Baghdad depending on what you want, The most important thing is; "Can We Trust you"?

Once the funds get to you, simply take out 20% as your share and keep the remaining 80% for us. Your own part of this deal is to find a safe place where the funds can be sent to, ours is sending it to you safely. Also you can view this Link for proper verification
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/middle_east/2988455.stm
If you are interested I will furnish you with more details upon receipt of your response and contact details.

But I can assure you the whole process is simple and we must keep a low profile at all times. I look forward to your reply and co-operation.

Regards,
Capt. Scott J . Wright
Private and secured e-mail: capt_scott_wright@yahoo.ie
UNITED WE STAND 4 LIFE !!

And, here is my fun filled reply...
Captain Scott,
(or as the military likes to have it.. Capt. Wright. I mean, we are not really on first names basis here are we? I really don't know you that well yet. And my father always taught me to use a person's last name when speaking to them)

hmmm.. your suggestion is an interesting one. I must say that having that much money around would be nice. However, the article you cited said that $100 million dollars was found. And that a week prior to that over $650 million dollars was found.

The article also mentioned that these monies were securely stored and taken to a secure location to be counted and would then be returned to Iraqi control back in 2003. Have you really managed to hold on to that much money all this time? What about the other $90 million? Hey, are you holding out on me?

If you really are military captain, then why use a gmail account? And isn't it illegal to confiscate found money on the battlefield and then send it overseas?

Also, from that article you cited as evidence of your reality and truthfulness:

"Funds will remain secure until a stable government is established in Iraq and will ultimately be returned to the Iraqis to assist in the re-building of their nation. Five US soldiers are currently being questioned by military officials after some of that money was allegedly stolen following its discovery."

Am I to take it then that you are one of the 5 US soldiers that was accused of stealing money and that it is this money that you are asking me to "deposit" for you? If so, I wonder what you mother would say about this. Do you think she would be proud of her boy doing something like this? I know my mom wouldn't. She would be very cross.

I also have to ask, why do I need to provide you with my contact details when you have already emailed me? Don't you know who you emailed? By the way, how did you find me? I thought I was well hidden enough from "the man". Hey... you aren't with the Feds are you? Are you spying on me? Man, this ain't fair. I was told that hiding here would keep me clear and now you send me an email trying to entrap me? Trying to make me do something to out myself? No way man!! NO WAY MAN!! I know you. I KNOW YOU!!

You can try and find me but i will be gone by the time you get here. hah ha hahaaa hahahahaa hahahaa... see, I am one step ahead of you. Always one step ahead.

Oh, if you want to send me that check, go ahead.

Sincerely yours

(I wonder if I will get a reply. I can't wait)